Chell's Roost

Blog & gallery of a geeky, anti-lima bean bookworm

How to Vaccuum with a Bissell CleanView

Bissell CleanView
Step 1:
Bring the Bissell CleanView model 1816 (9595, for non-Target shoppers) home, giddy over your savings on this purchase. Decide to keep family awake, and stay up late to use it for the first time. Sleep and dog hair be darned!
Step 2:
Turn the vacuum on, and oogle over the cyclonic, dust bunny-destroying power. The mini crumb twister in the canister is like your very own mesmerizing, mall-style coin funnel.
Step 3:
Notice, quickly, that the twister is running out of fuel, as the crumbs are held up in the top part of the canister. Also notice a burning sensation on your ankles. Empty the canister, and turn the machine back on, hoping that what is still caught in the top will eventually work its way down.
Step 4:
Remove the hose end to try out the attachments. Smash your toes under the vacuum’s handle when the short hose length causes it to immediatly and violently topple over.
Step 5:
Turn the vacuum off, and unwind the strip of throw rug from the TurboBrush attachment. Note that while the attachment is powerful enough to stripe rugs, it is gentle enough to pet dog hair.
Step 6:
Smash your toes under the @#!!%! vacuum’s handle, while unwinding the strip of rug, and violently toppling the machine over.
Step 7:
Reattach the hose end, for regular vacuuming. Start vacuuming. Stop to reattach the hose end, which has come loose. Push the button to lean the vacuum into operating position. Put it back upright. Reattach the hose end.
Step 8:
Start vacuuming. Feel gravel burn on your ankles again, and realize the vacuum is shooting debris out the back. Also notice the bottleneck in the top of the canister. Get covered in dust and debris while taking the filter out of the canister, to clear the jam. Replace it. Wash hands and arms. Repeat step 8. Several times.
Step 9:
Push button to open washable filter compartment. Keep trying, when the compartment won’t open. Keep trying. Let another person try. Be relieved when it opens upon a last ditch effort. Wash the filter. Wait a day for it to dry.
Step 10:
Start vacuuming again. Feel burning on ankles. Accept this as a part of vacuuming. Use hose to vacuum socks and scattered debris. Smash your toes under the @#!!%! vacuum’s handle.
Step 11:
Tire of the sensation of driving over railroad tracks, caused by the vacuum’s bottom-positioned power cord and worthless top holder. Decide to vacuum stairs, instead. Using attachment, start on bottom steps. Smash your toes and the violently dislodged TurboBrush under the @#!!%! vacuum’s handle. Set the brush pieces aside.
Step 12:
Pick the vacuum up with one hand, and realize that such a complex machine requires much weight. Finish the stairs. Appreciate the relaxing time spent afterwards, fixing the TurboBrush.

Don’t waste your money on this machine. >:-(

Planned Organ Trafficking

I’ve been quiet about the Planned Parenthood body part selling issue for a couple of reasons. One is denial. Hadn’t even watched the video (apparently, there are more) until today. The whole thought seems like something out of a horror movie. Except that movies are safe to watch. And this is a real-life horror for the babies who are killed, and their body parts, for lack of a better word, harvested. I don’t want to believe this is actually happening. But it is. Because a look at additional news sources reveals that Planned Parenthood defends its “tissue” harvesting program. Why defend what isn’t happening?

I’ve always been against women being forced to complete their pregnancies. Not that I would ever have an abortion. I, personally, am very against that. Life is a gift. I can’t imagine putting out the flame of life that belongs to what would be a baby, a human being, who should enjoy whatever that promise of life may bring. However, pregnancy affects two human beings, one of them from the start. I also can’t imagine telling that one what she can and can’t do with her own body. I could no more victimize a woman in this manner than I could victimize an unborn baby, even before it becomes a baby.

Planned Parenthood Organ Harvesting

I did use the word, “baby,” here, in the first paragraph. I believe this is the accurate term. Whether or not the baby can breathe on its own, in order for Planned Parenthood to be trying not to crush body parts and organs in the process of harvesting them, there need to be body parts and organs. That’s not formless cell clusters. That’s a baby. They are trying not to crush body parts while aborting the baby. They want to kill the baby, but while keeping the body parts intact. This must be agonizing for the baby (and I have to mention again that the thought, alone, of killing the baby, should be agonizing to the mother).

The idea of killing a perfectly healthy, growing human being, and harvesting his or her body parts for whatever reason seems wrong. The kind of wrong that makes me want to avoid knowing that anyone could be acting on that idea. I don’t use this word often to describe things that can be described in more clinical, factual terms, but the idea seems evil. And there’s no avoiding knowing about it now. It’s been brought to light. Now that we know about it, this evil practice should be stopped, immediately, within our society. Since Planned Parenthood has proven to be underhanded in this major issue (this isn’t an accounting error – it’s human organ trafficking), they should be shut down. And prosecuted.

Bragging a Little

Just bragging, a little bit. This is my uber talented hubby, doodlin’ around on the keyboard. He thought he’d see if he could play “Year of the Cat.” I think he could be playing the most charming and classiest of candlelit venues.

Restrict Articles to Specific Users in Joomla 3.4

For a CMS, plugins can conveniently add functionality, but I don’t want to add a plugin for every last little task. Especially when out-of-the-box functionality can accomplish what I want to do.

Joomla is a superb CMS for a variety of purposes. It’s my own choice for one of my websites. For that site, I needed the ability to restrict certain articles to specific, registered users. While one might expect to choose, from the article-creation page, specific users who may view the article, this is not the case. It is possible to select a general access level for the article, but there may be many users who have the same access level. There are quite a few content and member management plugins available, but here is how to set this up without a plugin.

First, create a new group (Users » Groups » Add New Group). If you sell building supplies, and one of the construction companies you deal with is called “Jerry’s Houses,” create a group with that company name. I actually created a subgroup of registered users, to keep things neat, and placed my customer groups under that. That is up to you, and simply requires the creation of the desired groups. Create a separate group for each organization or individual you deal with. Keep in mind that a group may have as many users in it as you want, or only one user. All of Jerry’s employees will ultimately be able to view the content meant only for “Jerry’s Houses,” but other users won’t see that content.

Create an access level (Users » Access Levels » Add New Access Level). You can name it the same as the group name you created. Under “User Groups Having Viewing Access,” select the group that will be able to view the content. So the group, “Jerry’s Houses,” would be selected to have such access for the access level of the same name. Do this for each group you have created.

Now, when you create an article, you can select from the “Access” dropdown to restrict viewing to the desired access level/group. To allow certain users to view the article, make sure you have added them to the appropriate group.

I took this a step further, and set up a “customer area” category, and a menu item that points there. The menu item is only viewable by the subgroup that contains my targeted groups. It (the menu item) is a “blog” of customer area items, and the articles I create for specific groups are placed only in the customer area category.

There is one other thing that made this work well for me. It is off topic, for this post, but handy. Users may need to view files that I upload just for them (specific users), and I want them to only see the files via my website. I created a folder for such files, and restricted access to everything in it via an htaccess file. Only my server can show the files. Then, I enabled iframe tags for the article editor in Joomla (Extensions » Plugin Manager » Editor – TinyMCE). To do this, remove “iframe” from the list of prohibited elements. Now, I can simply place an iframe that contains a selected file in an article.

Although it’s likely possible to get the same result with a plugin, it’s doable with only an understanding of users, groups, and access levels.

Bike Ride

Pook and I went on the most perfect bike ride tonight. Went through the park by Foot Lake, and through part of downtown. Seven months after our move, and I just love it here. There are so many lakes nearby, and Foot Lake is just the closest one. This is, as I normally call them, a cruddy cell phone pic. Why can’t summer last forever? :) Anyway, there’s not much to this post, except to wish everyone at least an equally enjoyable evening.